ERIC CARTMAN: Don't you ever, EVER compare me to Family Guy, you hear me Kyle? Compare me to Family Guy again and so help me, I will kill you where you stand! Do you have any idea what it's like? Everywhere I go: "Hey Cartman you must like Family Guy, right?" "Hey, your sense of humor reminds me of Family Guy, Cartman!" I am nothing like Family Guy! When I make jokes they are inherent to a story! Deep situational and emotional jokes based on what is relevant and has a point, not just one random interchangeable joke after another!
Maybe you remember the satirical script for Phantom Menace that got sent around when the movie came out. It definitely helped me through the grieving process. Anyway I can't believe this site is still around. And that I remembered the url.
"'Political jokes weren't a form of active resistance but valves for pent-up public anger.'" And the understanding that inspired such humor makes the inaction that accompanied it all the more unforgiveable: "...the country wasn't possessed by 'evil spirits' nor was it hypnotised by the Nazis' brilliant propaganda, he says. Hypnotized people don't crack jokes."
Before you make the understandable misinterpretation, I think the Daily Show et al provide a valuable service in exposing the vapidity of current political discourse. But if it's a narcotic (it is) let it be an amphetamine, not an anaesthetic.
APRIL 12 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 13 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 14 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 15 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 16 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 17 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 18 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 19 - Watch TV without being able to concentrate.
APRIL 20 - Die in wanking accident.
JUNE 17, 2012 - Council Tax bailiffs discover decomposed body.
"You've seen them. There's one that's been sitting on a shelf gathering dust in your uncle Billy's garage for 30 years now. It's image flickers through your head when you're daydreaming about hotrods and monster movies and eating corndogs at the carnival."
i got pranked
(18:46:07) mactheosx: Ilxor?
(18:46:10) Lukas: ?
(18:46:20) mactheosx: ure weird lol
(18:46:40) Lukas: huh. still blank.
(18:46:55) mactheosx: i just got my new laptop today, i'm excited lol
(18:46:59) Lukas: oh
(18:47:02) Lukas: nice white font
(18:47:13) Lukas: glad you like the laptop
(18:47:15) Lukas: yeah
(18:47:15) mactheosx: oh =-O
(18:47:17) Lukas: me ilxor
(18:47:31) mactheosx: I understand
(18:48:30) mactheosx: Your not talkign
(18:48:43) Lukas: i'm a bit busy at the moment
(18:48:55) mactheosx: busy causes stress, and thats not good lol
(18:49:02) Lukas: i agree!
(18:49:13) mactheosx: uh huh... sure lol
(18:50:18) mactheosx: is there something u want to know about me?
(18:50:40) Lukas: like your name?
(18:50:43) Lukas: that'd be nice
(18:50:49) mactheosx: lol your funny
(18:51:18) mactheosx: haha, FunnyMuffin.com has really funny pictures. have you ever been there?
(18:51:38) Lukas: er, no
(18:51:50) mactheosx: well, maybe
(18:51:50) Lukas: i'll put it on the list, tho
(18:52:07) mactheosx: ure weird lol
(18:53:08) Lukas: right, i'm weird. you're writing in all white and won't tell me your name!
(18:53:09) mactheosx: uh hello? why aren't you talking?
(18:53:24) Lukas: cuz i want to finish my work and get out of the office
(18:53:35) mactheosx: i am NOT your babe...
(18:54:14) Lukas: um
(18:54:14) Lukas: ok
(18:54:24) mactheosx: what?
(18:54:52) Lukas: you said you weren't my babe
(18:55:06) mactheosx: leave me uot of this. i did nothing wrong
(18:55:22) Lukas: you're a bot, aren't you?
(18:55:36) mactheosx: im not a bot, lol did u really think i was?
(18:55:51) Lukas: heh, prove me wrong
(18:56:01) mactheosx: ugh
(18:56:17) mactheosx: You have been talking to a computer! One of your friends is reading the whole conversation and laughing it up right now! GET EVEN! Have the bot talk to all your friends by visiting chattingaimbot.com
Things My Girlfriend And I Have Argued About. I was going to call this the best site ever, but as I've already awarded that crown, I'll settle for mentioning that I no longer read this site at work, for fear of attracting attention with all the laughing and snorting. (You didn't visit the site the first time I mentioned it, did you? Do it now.)
Crazy Apple Rumors
"At first I thought he was kidding!" Anderson exclaimed. "Then [Apple Senior Vice President for Applications] Sina [Tamaddon] says 'Wow, that's really beautiful. You're a beautiful, beautiful person.' All of a sudden I'm thinking, 'Oh, shit.'"
Henry Raddick's Reviews
You know, the problem with writing a link summary after spending twenty minutes perusing the link is that I'm frequently too overwhelmed with enthusiasm to write with a clear head. For example, in this case I'm tempted to write something like "SING, HENRY, SING YOUR HEART OUT" which just wouldn't be right.